Thursday, 14 July 2016

A little confession



That's what your nickname been given since 2015
So, here's a little confession..

Do you still remember that moment on our 2 years of friendship celebration event, I got a question where I'm being asked whom I wanna go out with if I had a chance? I was mesmerized by the question but my answered was.. "Since it's you, rafael (not a real name) being my partner tonight, so  I wanna go out with you." & I was overheard something that you said "tu je?". It was maybe because my answer doesn't satisfied you. 


Let's make it clear- the actual answer to that question is; I wanna go out with you because I really like you. I wanna spend my days with you since you brought calmness every time when I see you. I love seeing youo smile. I love the way you talk even though it kinda annoyed me sometimes xD I talked about almost everyday. I miss you as soon I woke up. Nah, there's too much answer for that only one question.


To be really honest,

I am really scared of my own feelings. I don't want to get hurt again but i can't help myself from falling for you either. Each day, every time when I saw you not even a second I could be tired of. I used to be in love before but it doesn't lasts long. It takes time for me to heal. A really long period.

I know you might not having the same feelings as mine but I just want you to know this- not even a day I went through, not thinking of you. One-sided love is hard but by not telling you what's inside of my heart is even harder to cope with. Sorry.

But, hey..

Let's just keep in touch as a friend if that makes you feel comfortable :) we're friends after all this while either. Act like nothing happened & life must goes on. That's how it's supposed to be. No hard feelings. "Satu peluang sahaja", "Bila aku jatuh cinta", "Bukankah Aku?" songs that reminds me of you since it's Awi Rafael sings it (& for sure the lyrics has it owns significant meanings). 

I'll be okay as long as you're okay. Don't worry. It tooks me about a year for finally told you (well, it happened since we're in semester 3 last year) but let's just leave it to Him. If you really meant to be mine,.. and if I am really meant to be yours, not even a million years we could ever be separated. Believing in qada' & qadar by having faith in Him is what we should have. 

Lepas ni kita akan buat haluan masing-masing dek kerana tuntutan kerja. But I hope we won't lost contact as a friend. Because, I will always be longing for you.

Thank you for having me as your friend. 

your "awi rafael" fangirl

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